Interview with Damien
This interview was conducted with Damien in November of 2019. Damien is the founder of BoyPlanet.net, one of the newest boylove boards. He originally started BPN many years ago, but closed it shortly after creation. He reopened it in December 2017.
FalseAlias: What made you want to create BoyPlanet without any email system at all? Anonymity is good, but having no emails might be seen as a disadvantage by many. There are anonymous email providers, like ProtonMail, so what makes having no emails better for BPN members?
Damien: In short it allows access to BPN without the fuss of supplying an email address and saves one from having a 3rd party link to the board.
The best management systems are designed to be secure and limit liability, and with such inherent strict defaults come benefit and drawback. It is considered a drawback to not be able to recover account details or receive email notifications from BPN. The benefit is that the information within BPN does not have a route to travel out of BPN via email, and account integrity is more certain as accounts cannot be compromised via email account recovery methods.
FA: Creating a board takes a lot of time and effort, as everyone already knows (at least, I hope they do). What sort of things did you have to consider when you were busy writing up the guidelines for BPN? Was there a logical pattern to guideline placement, or did they just go in the order you wrote them?
Damien: The first guidelines were largely borrowed from BLN (boylover.net) and were modified by others more than myself. As far as how orderly they are, they require constant tending in order to remain relevant. Given enough time, the intention of a rule that is not maintained, later becomes lost when interpreted.
FA: What is most important, to you, about running BPN?
Damien: To state that "I" run would be inaccurate of course, but, the important thing to me is fostering a community that operates as public property as much as possible and not the private property it is in reality. I wish that it would occur to more people operating boards that they are in fact civil servants. The tone of a board comes from the top down just like any business. If the people at the top are primarily interested in serving their own needs, or kicking their feet up and doing nothing but having a title, or promoting double standards, or disallowing some topics and ideas, then there is little reason for anyone to really care and embrace their duties and push the board to success.
FA: Are there any memorable BPN registrations that tickle you?
Damien: Oh how I wish I could list specific ones but doing so would be to violate member privacy. There are interesting registrations nearly every day.
FA: BoyPlanet used to exist some number of years ago, too, but you elected to close it down after less than a year of operation. Why was it closed? What made you bring it back at the end of 2017? And, what made you decide to style BoyPlanet in a similar fashion to BoyLover.net?
Damien: Last thing first... The original design of BPN was space-themed from the graphics to the room names. While that worked well at the time, I felt that a more neutral and conventional implementation would be more comfortable. It made sense to borrow from the successful BLN format; to use a minimalist approach for the board's software and to resurrect feelings for the BLN veterans still kicking around. As for why I did not keep the original BPN going, there wasn't a real need at the time for another board, it was simply a fun thing rather than providing a needed service for the community. Many years later in 2017 I did find that the community needed a board that is stable and here we are today.
FA: Are you related to the Damien who used to be a member of BoyLover.net?
Damien: Not at all. In fact I believe that person used a different spelling, Damian.
FA: Do you think the demise of BoyLover.net could've been prevented, or would you rather not speculate on this without more information?
Damien: Most things in life can be prevented if you can speculate on what can go wrong in advance, like, having a spare tire for your vehicle. I'll say this much: if you know have a spare tire only a fool would hit has many potholes as he could.
FA: Did members make you feel welcome when you joined your first boylove forum?
Damien: Definitely. I felt very welcomed at BLN, and each person that chimes in an introductory thread makes the new member feel like they belong.
FA: Up until BoyPlanet started, I don't think anyone knew you as “Damien”, so how long have you been in the boylove community with this username, and how long were you in the boylove community before you were Damien?
Damien: I've been Damien since re-founding BPN, so I've been Damien since October 24th 2017. I first happened upon the boards in 2003 and read things (at a time when many boards still allowed some read-only access), but I didn't have a computer that was solely mine until 2004 so I didn't feel comfortable in joining a site until that time.
FA: When did you most recently return to it, and what made you want to?
Damien: I've been in and out of the online BL community since I found it. The reasons for leaving and returning have always been by choice and varied. If I had to give a simple answer, curiosity makes me return.
FA: Do you think that the closure of three boylove boards in such rapid succession (YoungCity in late January 2018, BoyLover.org in February 2018, and Enchanted Island in March 2018) is a connected incident, or are they all separate?
Damien: Anything can be speculated.
FA: We both know BLo and EI went down because of a malicious DMCA spam attack, but YC still hasn't confirmed their reason for termination. Even today, there is only speculative theory. Would you speculate about YC's demise, or would you like to refrain from commenting without evidence to support anything?
Damien: Again, we can speculate as much as we like but won't get anywhere.
FA: Do you think the current community has any flaws that need to be patched up or worked on?
Damien: How much time do you have?
The biggest flaw right now is how people feel about themselves -- not so much the veterans of the community -- but people who are trying to understand their feelings in a world of stigma and expectation. I imagine that they are rarely looking deeper within themselves straight out of the gate concerning their attractions. And with the rise of the darknet they are thinking with their dick and not happening upon fruitful sites of interest like boylinks and discussion boards; so they end up propagating the stereotypes expected of them and do not discover legitimacy in their feelings. Given enough time I believe this darknet thing is setting people up for failure and not advancing awareness.
FA: When you joined the boylove community, what were your initial observations? How has your view of the community changed since that time?
Damien: My initial observation was that the online community was large. Though, activity has been in some decline due to the reasons I just stated regarding your question about flaws in the BL community. Thankfully the community endures.
FA: What is your fondest memory of being in the boylove community? No doubt, there must be at least something good from all your time here.
Damien: I have fond memories of people I have met in person. And also my first discovery of the online community was a bit of a shock; I could not believe the conversation that people were having.
FA: Have you had any interactions with community members that you regret? What would you say to them if you had the opportunity?
Damien: I once worked at a board and I had what I thought was a valid bitch. Whether or not it was valid is of no consequence, but the way I inadvertently created the situation and verbally 'fought back' was wrong. It wasn't that important, I should have just been humble rather than typing out my dissatisfaction out of anger.
FA: In however many years you've been around as a person, have you ever loved?
Damien: Yes. It is best to just remember the good times.
FA: When did you start to realise that you were interested in boys? What prompted that first thought?
Damien: Unlike some boylovers, there was never a time in my life that I wasn't interested in boys. Puberty did not alter my sexual interests and physical attractions so I didn't have a decidedly first thought about it.
FA: Are you attracted to just boys, or are girls involved too?
Damien: I am not interested in girls, or anything girly for that matter.
FA: What is your AoA, and has it ever changed or moved?
Damien: The concept of AoA is a flawed one. People should think of their interests with fluidity.
FA: Do you have a type of boy? Any particular hair colours, skin colours, physical attributes, face shapes?
Damien: As with the AoA inquiry I am fluid in my interests.
FA: Do you think being a boylover means one must have a sexual desire for boys, or can it be a purely emotional attraction?
Damien: There is neither a ceiling or a floor to attraction. It does not have to be any one thing.
FA: You're a boylover, and you've obviously been one for a pretty long time. Would I be correct to assume you've learned a few things in handling your attraction that you might be able to share with the younger boylovers?
Damien: Yes. Don't get old. Haha.
On a serious note, I do not think of myself as a model to look up to, and maybe that outlook of myself keeps me aspiring to be a better person so I take my stability for-granted. I do not know how 'younger BoyLover' specific this will be: no matter how old you are or how new you are to the community you will have a better time of things if you stand up for what you believe in as much what others believe in. Constantly re-evaluate yourself and do not take anything too seriously.
FA: What type of person do you think you are?
Damien: I wish that I knew. Perhaps The Observer Effect prevents anyone from having extremely accurate answers. If I must state something, hmm.. I would say that I am a person that is not afraid to be wrong so that I can be more receptive to new adventures.
FA: As a person who takes pride in writing their contributions to good quality, do you like reading too?
Damien: I do enjoy reading though I am not the type to sit down with a book. That said, running up to the day that the last Harry Potter book was released, having never read any of them, I sat down and read all of them from the first to last in about 6 days.
FA: Have you ever had any experience with the legal system related to your attractions to children?
Damien: I do not have first hand experience. I have always kept to myself and have done my best to live simply.
FA: Do you think any of the chronophilias are caused exclusively by genetic factors, or are environmental factors of significant importance too?
Damien: It is generally believed that sexual preference is mixture of genetic and environmental factors. I do not believe that it matters; we have all arrived, bound by the ignorance of the unyielding pack and most desperate parts in our throbbing flesh.
FA: Do you believe that paedophilia, or boylove, should be legally recognised as a sexuality?
Damien: I believe that it is ridiculous that sexualities have such inherent emphasis placed on them that they even factor into rule of law and moral decency.
FA: Do you think that parents over-protect their children in current society, or would you say they're too care-free about what their children do?
Damien: This question is parent specific isn't it? I cannot provide much insight here.
FA: If you had free reign to run a school of little kids (between ages 4 and 10) for a day, what would you do?
Damien: Suppose I would encourage a day away from structure and expectations, to day-dream without screens or internet, to interact with one another on a visceral level in this ever-so-increasing world of passive communication.
FA: What do you think of the debate between labels? Paedophile/Boylover/MAP?
Damien: I think the reality is that it is a non-debate. This question goes beyond labels. It is more an issue of semantics rather than true differences.. When sensibilities do collide, how people handle them is what truly defines them -- a label does not define or identify anyone really -- what person wants to be reduced down to a single word known as a label? Though, it can be safer and easier to push new and uncomfortable ideas away by clinging to labels, where embracing other perspectives can require care outside of personal comfort zones to identify and sympathize with them, and if you believe you are a label you are not doing yourself many favors. Labels are safe when they do not carry expectations, but what label can do that? It is up to each person to divest themselves when it comes to working with and understanding labels.